So it's now been one and a half weeks of bleeding. I am going seriously insane. Just when I think it's tapering off & I'm getting a clear day - BAM!! I get a dark red bleed with clot. Awesome.
So, tomorrow is D-day. I'm going for a private scan. I'm so scared of what we'll see.. or not see, more to the point.
On the one hand I feel positive that I don't bleed heavy enough to hit a pad, and it's usually dark blood. But on the other hand I've read other women's accounts of their miscarriages, and some of theirs started this way too. I'm trying to be positive but I also want to be prepared for bad news. How exactly do you get prepared for this kind of news though??
I'm not religious at all, but I've been praying to.. whomever.. to please let me keep this baby, and please let him/her be healthy! I know I deserve to finally get my wish.. but it feels so far away now. This is out of anyone's hands.
Time for bed. I just hope I go to bed tomorrow night knowing my baby is still there, still going strong, and all's well in my little world. Goodnight... I hope!
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