January 18, 2015

Here we go again.. cycle #7

Well, here we are again.

I just stared at those words for a while.. unsure what to say next, and in genuine disbelief that we are still aboard the IVF rollercoaster.

We have now had 4 full stim cycles & 2 frozen embryo transfers for baby number 2 over the course of 12 months. But here we are again. Embarking upon cycle number 7 (another full stim ICSI cycle using frozen sperm this time). Our beautiful son (now 2.2yrs) only took 3 cycles. I fell pregnant on cycle number 2 but we lost that one at 10weeks (molar pregnancy). I felt, and still do feel, very lucky. But somehow I also felt, I guess, cocky. I was able to fall pregnant 2 out of 3 times. Surely those odds meant we would have no trouble conceiving again?! Boy was I wrong!!!

Firstly, apologies to anyone who has been trying way longer than us, and who has experienced more hardship & pain along the way. I know there are a lot of you out there. I read a lot of your blogs & see your posts in forums. I've cried for you. So I know I am very fortunate. But I don't feel my family is complete. I desperately want to give my son a sibling, especially as we are much older parents. He shouldn't be burdened with elderly parents on his own, and he should be able to reminisce about his childhood with someone who was there. My brothers & I have this luxury. I want him to have that too.

I'm giving us 6 months to see what happens.

So, here we go again.